"for what it's worth, it was worth all the while..."

so, what am I talking about? I guess just life in general. mine, in this case. obviously. random song lyrics are illuminated in my mind as I hear them. and just as sudden I play it over and over and over in my mind.

and I begin to think back. 24 years. what have I achieved? who have I lost? whether by choice or not. who am I? round and round thoughts begin to sally forth, in brilliant flashes of light or a dull, dimming conflagration of that which once was. a love that once was felt, but I being myself did not do anything, did nothing but wait. or an idea propelling light in a light bulb, but that instantaneously dies along with the thought. just fragments. fragmentary meanderings on thoughtless actions, or carefully thought about reactions resulting on a dead end. a dead end because in the end, I chose wrong. and yet on the other hand, I know that I am in the right path. though I have made many wrong choices, I am there. getting to where I should be. so that in the end it really is worth all the while, and as the song goes "it's something unpredictable but in the end is right, I hope you had the time of your life."